On Nights Like These"
by Silvernyte Rhuka
Summary: a songfic done to 'After Midnight', Zel/Lina; this inspired me to add to it and create "Blame it on the Moon"


"On Nights Like These"  
done to "After Midnight", lyrics by Mercedes Lackey  
  
  
~ In the dead, dark hours after midnight  
When the world seems to stop in its place,  
You can see just a little more clearly,  
You can look your life in the face, ~  
  
Zelgadis looked out the window at the moon shining high in   
the sky and sighed. It was on nights like these he could set   
aside the things he told himself, the things he forced himself   
to believe, and realize at least some truths that eluded him   
in the day. Things seemed so still, - so calm - that he could   
almost believe there was a place for him, somewhere, even as he   
is now. He could almost consider speaking his heart, but he knew   
that with the dawning of the sun it would sear away whatever   
thoughts made him think he could do so. He sighed again and stepped  
out of the room to walk to the balcony to enjoy the night air only  
to find Lina already there.  
  
~ You can see the things that you have to -  
Speak the words too true for the day.  
In the dead, dark hours after midnight,  
Little Friend, will you listen - and stay? ~  
  
He wandered to the bench and sat beside Lina silently and she just   
said "Beautiful," with a sigh.  
  
He just nodded and answered, "Yes, it is a beautiful night," not  
understanding she was referring to him and how he looked with   
the moonlight shining on him.  
  
"Zel," she said quietly. "Do you ever wonder if what you thought   
you wanted most was... I don't know, worthless, useless,   
unnecessary?" She stared straight at the moon in deep thought.  
  
"On nights like these, yeah." He answered honestly. "Sometimes I   
even wonder why I search for my cure with such obsession."  
  
Suddenly she looked right at him and they locked eyes. After a   
minute she spoke softly, "Maybe that's because you don't need one."  
  
~ In the time that I never knew you  
I could view the world as my own -   
I was god's own gift to his creatures,  
And I wore an armor of stone. ~  
  
Zel looked away and blushed, how could she say that? He was a   
freak, wasn't he? But somehow she seemed to forget what he was.   
He smiled as he thought about how he had been before he met her.   
She brought him friendship, laughter, fun, someone to remind him   
there was more to life than moping around. Then he spoke, "Maybe   
you're right."  
  
He knew he couldn't imagine who he would have been without her,   
or could he? Oh, he'd have truly become a monster, caring only for   
his cure. And he realized that meant that he'd be every bit the   
monster he feared people saw him as, and even if he did turn his   
body human again his soul would have became a monster's.  
  
~ I was wise and faithful and noble -  
I was pompous, pious, and cold.  
I was cruel when I never meant it -  
Too cool to touch or to hold. ~  
  
Zel looked at Lina and saw her smile, and without thinking smiled   
back. He knew before, even when he was human, he'd never have smiled  
so openly. He thought to himself, 'On a night like tonight you could  
blame it on the moon.'  
  
"Sometimes I wonder what I'm looking for," Lina said suddenly. "Or   
why I'm even looking at all."  
  
"Maybe you've already found it," Zel said in response, "And you   
just haven't realized it yet." Then they stared at each other.  
  
~ It was you who broke through my armor;  
It was you who breached the wall,  
With your pain and your desperation -  
How could I not answer your call? ~  
  
Even as he saw her smile at that he saw the pain and doubt written  
on her face. He then knew, consciously, what a part of him had known  
since he first saw her. He knew of the pain inside her that drove   
her desperately to search for something she couldn't put a name to.   
His heart reached out to her and he placed a hand on her shoulder.   
"And if you haven't, I hope you find it soon." Then he leaned   
forward and kissed her, he was somewhat surprised when she started   
to kiss back.  
  
~ How could I have guessed you would touch me,  
And in ways I couldn't control?  
How could I have known I would need you -  
Or have guessed you'd see to my soul? ~  
  
Almost hungrily the kiss deepened and they embraced, then suddenly   
she broke the kiss and moved her head to kiss his ear a few times   
before speaking, "I think I found it." Then she kissed his ear a   
few more times, "And did anyone ever tell you that you have the   
cutest ears?"  
  
He grinned and laughed softly, "No, no one's ever told me that   
until now." He could barely believe it, she cared for him - loved   
him even! He felt so happy he was sure he should have burst.  
  
~ For as I taught you so you've taught me,  
How to love and why to care -  
For your love has thawed my winter,  
Taught me how to feel and dare. ~   
  
'Gods,' he wondered, 'how could I have ever lived before this?'   
They way he felt so suddenly... alive, made him wonder if what   
he had been doing before wasn't just simply existing. But what   
was the point on wondering about the past when there was so much   
to do. Now that there was so much to live for now that he had   
found a place for himself, just as he is. He smiled contentedly.  
  
~ When I looked tonight I discovered,  
I could not again stand apart -  
In the dead, dark hours after midnight,  
I learned that I owe you my heart. ~  
  
"Zel," she whispered into his ear. "I love you."  
  
Zelgadis blinked and smiled. Yes, this was love. Like nothing he   
could have imagined before, love looking straight to the soul   
and binding two together into something so much more spectacular   
and wonderful than anything else. Something he felt, as he knew   
she felt that he could not again live without. He embraced her,   
her head nuzzling into his chest as his fingers stroked her soft   
hair. "I love you too Lina, beloved."  



End file.
